First trip to Ancona

Today I went to Ancona Hospital for an appointment with a Lymphodema specialist. Ancona is about 2 hours up the road and this is too far for Damaris to drive with her spine problems as they are. With that in mind, we had arranged for a White Cross (volunteer) ambulance crew to drive us there.

Before that, though, we had to rush over to the kennels where we put the dogs on occasions like this. The temperature here is over 30C at the moment and it would have been hell for them to have sat in our car in the hospital car park for a couple of hours (as we thought, there turned out to be no shade). Even with all the windows and the sun-roof wide open it would have been an oven and grossly irresponsible of us.

Damaris wanted to leave them in the house but I was concerned about when we might arrive back. I was worried they might keep me in. Therefore, the kennels at 7am, it was.

We got up at 5am, left at 6am and arrived at the kennels near Bevagna at 6.45am. Mauro, the owner, met us and took them in.

We got back to the house at 7.30am and the ambulance arrived at 8am. As I suspected, I was too big to fit in the back of the estate car that they were proposing. A full-size ambulance was sent for from Foligno – 30 minutes away. Damaris decided to put our appointment back – just as well.

We eventually left at just after 9am and were perched on the edge of the bed. As the ambulance lurched down the side of the mountain that we live on, we were thrown from side to side and nearly onto the floor. The main road was not a whole lot better and the driver insisted on shooting traffic lights etc as if we were a ‘life and death’ emergency rather than me going for an appointment with a specialist.

Eventually we got to the hospital and I was transferred to a bed (the wheelchairs are too small and I can’t walk far enough to get anywhere). Lying on my bed in the lift, a blonde-haired doctor turned to my wife and said, “Quanti kili – lui?” (How much does he weigh?) I freaked and told him he was ill-educated with definite cretinous tendencies. He just sneered at me and we would have come to blows had not the other doctor and our ambulance driver (who was pushing me) made it clear that he had gone over the line.

Then it was Damaris’ turn. She handed over the paperwork that the Italians crave and then they gave her another form which asked her for information she’d already given on one of the forms we’d already handed in but they refused to give it back to her to copy it from.

Fortunately the experience with the doctor was not so bad. He insisted on speaking English – one of only a handful of people we’ve met who admit to knowing any. Most just giggle and go, “No Eeengleese”

At last, someone who actually believed that the bulges in my body are fluid-related and not down to an excess of spotted dick or fish and chips. He asked me about the pain and the searing burning sensation in my feet. He then gave me four jabs – 2 in my side (quite painless) and 2 in my feet (absolute agony). The chemical was cortisone and he told us that it would take two days for it to have an effect (at the time of writing my feet are still very sore). In return for the pain relief this would bring, I was to start walking a bit further and thus attack the circulation problem from that direction.

I am to return next week when he will start drainage of the fluid and repair of the skin. I am down to go to Foligno hospital for back x-rays so that he can see if there is anything he can do there, too. I asked him and it turns out that he is the resident scoliosis specialist and so Damaris is going to get him to give her a look over, too.

The journey back was a bit more comfortable as we swapped positions. We also both slept in the sunshine, having got up so early.

We picked the dogs up off of Mauro in the early evening and he refused to accept payment. Unfortunately he can’t do this on a regular basis for us as he will be away for 2 weeks in early September so we will have to find another dog-sitter.